Sins of the Parents

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Date:
October 15 2020
Length:
54min 42s
Downloads:
47
Views:
621
Comments:
2

Venue: OU Israel Center OU Israel Center

Machshava:
Sexuality,  Teshuva 
Parsha:
Bereishit 

Description

Who Killed Hevel? How do the events of the second and third chapters of Bereishit contribute to the tragic events in the fourth chapter?

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    1. Title: Birth of Narcissism
      Author: Judith Katz
      Reply
      Thank you so much for this detailed psychological analysis of this family dynamic. I have been searching for psychological commentaries about kayin and hevel, why hevel is named 'nothingness', vanity, emptiness, why no one acknowledges the price kayin is paying on behalf of his parents, many more questions. It seems to me that kayin's predicament has all the underlying elements that creates a narcissistic personality disorder. In fact, Torah shows us different aspects of narcissistic spectrum disorder- ie a narrowed, suffocated field of identity awareness that alienates the soul from its divine source- and, by seeing how the alienation came about, how the repair can be made. Kayin's difficult position in the family, essentially a substitute for his father who seems to have abandoned them, as bread winner, farmer, first born son, has been dealt a tough hand, vs Hevel, who spends his days counting sheep. Is Hevel really the 'good' son or is he just the one with few expectations? Does Kayin not deserve acknowledgement from Hashem? Hashem's demand for humility from Kayin requires an ego crushing psycho- spiritual stretch that Kayin refuses to make, blaming his brother, lashing out and killing him with his anger, sending Kayin further into exile and alienation. He becomes a builder- and 'king'- of 'cities' in order to rebuild his own integrity in his own mind without teshuva. Kayin is a very pitiful character and describes perfectly the creation and dilemma of a narcissist.
    2. Title: Birth of Narcissism
      Author: Judith Katz
      Reply
      Thank you so much for this detailed psychological analysis of this family dynamic. I have been searching for psychological commentaries about kayin and hevel, why hevel is named 'nothingness', vanity, emptiness, why no one acknowledges the price kayin is paying on behalf of his parents, many more questions. It seems to me that kayin's predicament has all the underlying elements that creates a narcissistic personality disorder. In fact, Torah shows us different aspects of narcissistic spectrum disorder- ie a narrowed, suffocated field of identity awareness that alienates the soul from its divine source- and, by seeing how the alienation came about, how the repair can be made. Kayin's difficult position in the family, essentially a substitute for his father who seems to have abandoned them, as bread winner, farmer, first born son, has been dealt a tough hand, vs Hevel, who spends his days counting sheep. Is Hevel really the 'good' son or is he just the one with few expectations? Does Kayin not deserve acknowledgement from Hashem? Hashem's demand for humility from Kayin requires an ego crushing psycho- spiritual stretch that Kayin refuses to make, blaming his brother, lashing out and killing him with his anger, sending Kayin further into exile and alienation. He becomes a builder- and 'king'- of 'cities' in order to rebuild his own integrity in his own mind without teshuva. Kayin is a very pitiful character and describes perfectly the creation and dilemma of a narcissist.

    Learning on the Marcos and Adina Katz YUTorah site is sponsored today by Miriam & Alan Goldberg and Ruth Peyser Kestenbaum to mark the thirteenth yahrtzeit of their father, Irwin Peyser, Harav Yisroel Chaim ben R’ Dovid V’ Fraidah Raizel Peyser