When we think about Tisha B’Av, most often we highlight the sorrow and tragedy experienced by our ancestors when the two Batei Mikdash were destroyed.  Many of us experience that sorrow and tragedy as our own. When we read through the Book of Eicha we feel firsthand the tragedy and sorrow that befell our nation. When we read through the Kinot we see the effort on behalf of our great rabbis and sages to internalize the sorrow of the Churban haBayit, the destruction of the Temple.  We additionally see the effort to make the tragedy our own in every generation, not merely an echo of a past event that we commemorate. 

Similarly, we recite Kinot not only about the Churban haBayit, but about the tragedies of every generation: the Crusades, the pogroms, the Chelmniski Masacres, and, of course, the Holocaust.  In past years, working in summer camps on the chinuch (educational) staff, I have always faced the problem of how to make the Kinot in particular and Tisha B’Av as a whole more meaningful to our children.  I have discovered that the best way for children to gain a better understanding and attachment to the sorrow and tragedy of the Beit haMikdash is by relating it to current tragedies happening in our own time such as terrorism in Israel, anti-Semitism in our own communities, or other tragedies with which our children may have more experience.   This helps to brings home the message and feeling of Tisha B’Av, so many years removed from the destruction.

However, of all the Kinot, the Kinah of Arzei haLevanon, the Kinah describing in horrific detail the death of the Asarah Harugei Malchut , the Ten Martyrs, composed by Rabbi Meir ben Yehiel stands out for its timeless power.  The main focus of this Kinah is on the destruction of the Gedolei Torah, the righteous of our nation, as the Kinah states: “טהורי לב קדושים מתו במיתה חמורה” – “pure of heart and consecrated, they suffered a harsh death”.  Listening to the descriptions of the deaths of these ten great men and leaders can bring anyone to tears. But every year as I read this Kinah, I am struck not only by the tragedy but by the optimism. Reading the individual stories, we see that not a single martyr bemoaned his death. Rabban Shimon ben Gamliel stretched out his neck and offered himself for sacrifice.   Rabbi Yishmael mourned over Rabban Gamliel, not over his own imminent execution.  Rabbi Elazar ben Shamua was reciting Kiddush, fulfilling a mitzvah with his final breath.  Most evident is Rabbi Akiva who embraces his fate with unparalleled perspective.

Rabbi Akiva was murdered when his body was raked with iron combs. His students witnessed the atrocity. Rabbi Akiva during his punishment was crying out the words of Shema.  His students questioned, “Rabbi Akiva, why are you crying Shema and with such joy and gusto?”  He responded, “I have never had the opportunity to say Shema with such complete devotion!  In Shema we say that we love Hashem with all our hearts and all our souls.  Now, finally, I have the opportunity to demonstrate the true meaning of this statement and I can love Hashem with all my heart and all my soul!”

Rabbi Akiva was an optimist even in death, a characteristic that defined him in life as well.  In the Gemara, Makot 24 a - b, there is a description of a group of rabbis when they witnessed the destruction of Yerushalayim:

Rabban Gamliel and Rabbi Elazar ben Azariah and Rabbi Yehoshua and Rabbi Akiva were walking on the road, and they heard the noise of the crowds at Rome [travelling] from Puteoli, a hundred and twenty miles away. They all fell down crying, but Rabbi Akiva laughed. They said to him: Why are you laughing? He said to them: Why are you crying? They said: These heathens who bow down to images and burn incense to idols live in safety and ease, whereas our Temple, the ‘Footstool’ of our God is burnt down by fire, and we should not cry? He responded to them: for the same reason I am laughing! If they that offend Him fare this way, how much better shall fare they that do obey Him!

כבר היה ר"ג ורבי אלעזר בן עזריה ורבי יהושע ורבי עקיבא מהלכין בדרך, ושמעו קול המונה של רומי מפלטה [ברחוק] מאה ועשרים מיל, והתחילו בוכין, ורבי עקיבא משחק. אמרו לו: מפני מה אתה משחק? אמר להם: ואתם מפני מה אתם בוכים? אמרו לו: הללו כושיים שמשתחוים לעצבים ומקטרים לעבודת כוכבים יושבין בטח והשקט, ואנו בית הדום רגלי אלהינו שרוף באש ולא נבכה?  אמר להן: לכך אני מצחק, ומה לעוברי רצונו כך, לעושי רצונו על אחת כמה וכמה.

Again, in this Gemara, we are witness to Rabbi Akiva’s characteristic optimism.  The other rabbis, upon hearing the cheers of the Romans are distraught and begin to mourn because the Jewish nation cannot worship Hashem but the Romans are joyous in their defeat. Rabbi Akiva, on the other hand, sees the joyful cries of the Romans as a reason to laugh, because if they who do not serve Hashem can be so great, imagine the greatness of those who do serve Hashem!    

The Gemara continues on to relate Rabbi Akiva’s optimism:

Once again they were coming up to Jerusalem together. As they approached Har HaTzofim, Mount Scopus they tore their clothes. As they approached the Temple Mount, they saw a fox emerging from the Holy of Holies. They began to weep. Rabbi Akiva was laughing. They said to him, Why are you laughing? He responded to them, “Why are you crying?” They said to him: A place of which it was once said, “And the stranger who comes near shall surely die” is now a home to foxes, and should we not cry? He responded to them: Therefore I am laughing; for it is written, “And I will take to Me faithful witnesses to record, Uriah the cohen, the priest, and Zechariah the Son of Jeberechiah”. Now what is the connection between Uriah the cohen and Zechariah, the prophet? Uriah lived during the times of the first Temple, while Zechariah lived during the second Temple; but the Navi linked the [later] prophecy of Zechariah with the [earlier] prophecy of Uriah.  In the [earlier] prophecy [in the days] of Uriah it is written, Therefore shall Zion for your sake be ploughed as a field etc. In Zechariah it is written, Thus said the Lord of Hosts, There shall yet old men and old women sit in the broad places of Yerushalayim. So long as Uriah's [threatening] prophecy had not yet been fulfilled, I worried that Zechariah's prophecy might, too, not be fulfilled; now that Uriah's prophecy has been fulfilled, it is quite certain that Zechariah's prophecy will also be fulfilled! The others said back to him: Akiva, you have comforted us! Akiva, you have comforted us!

שוב פעם אחת היו עולין לירושלים, כיון שהגיעו להר הצופים קרעו בגדיהם. כיון                שהגיעו להר הבית, ראו שועל שיצא מבית קדשי הקדשים, התחילו הן בוכין ור"ע מצחק. אמרו לו: מפני מה אתה מצחק? אמר להם: מפני מה אתם בוכים?  אמרו לו, מקום שכתוב בו (במדבר א) והזר הקרב יומת ועכשיו שועלים הלכו בו ולא נבכה? אמר להן: לכך אני מצחק, דכתיב (ישעיהו ח) ואעידה לי עדים נאמנים      את אוריה הכהן ואת זכריה בן יברכיהו, וכי מה ענין אוריה אצל זכריה? אוריה במקדש ראשון וזכריה במקדש שני! אלא, תלה הכתוב נבואתו של זכריה נבואתו

 של אוריה, באוריה כתיב (מיכה ג) לכן בגללכם ציון שדה תחרש [וגו] בזכריה כתיב (זכריה ח) עוד ישבו זקנים וזקנות ברחובות ירושלם, עד שלא נתקיימה נבואתו של אוריה - הייתי מתיירא שלא תתקיים נבואתו של זכריה, עכשיו שנתקיימה נבואתו של אוריה - בידוע שנבואתו של זכריה מתקיימת. בלשון הזה אמרו לו: עקיבא, ניחמתנו! עקיבא, ניחמתנו.

When the other rabbis began crying, they saw, as most people do, the destruction of the Beit HaMikdash as a tragedy, probably, and rightly so, as the ultimate tragedy.  They could no longer comprehend life without the Holy Temple.  Simultaneously, Rabbi Akiva began laughing.  Most probably, the other rabbis saw this as a tremendous insult.  Here they were, witnessing the downfall of our people, seeing God's angry hand reigning down upon them and Rabbi Akiva audaciously laughs? 

Rabbi Akiva's answer gives an entirely new perspective on Hashem's punishment to us, His own nation.  Rabbi Akiva, first questions the other rabbis back, "why are you crying?" To him the obvious response to what they see before them is laughter, not tears.  He is baffled as to why the others cry.  Only after hearing their answer for crying is Rabbi Akiva able to respond and explain why he laughs.  We should not be utterly distressed by this destruction. True it is terrible and heart wrenching, but it is also the fulfillment of nevuah, of prophecy! Had the words of the Prophet not come true regarding the destruction of Yerushalayim, then there would be no chance that the words of the Prophet regarding the ultimate redemption would come true. Here we see that they too will now come true!  And for this he laughed! He was excited! He sees the good in all things! The other rabbis, in turn, respond that Rabbi Akiva’s hopefulness has been a source of comfort to them and they are now consoled.             

Many people have learned from the example set by Rabbi Akiva when they confront sorrow and tragedy in their own lives.  I have seen firsthand twice this past year where individuals have treated their sorrow and tragedy with the approach of Rabbi Akiva.  Rather than becoming paralyzed by life's vicissitudes, they turned their tragedy into an opportunity for improvement. 

A woman who experiences a miscarriage feels immense tragedy.  For the expectant mother, there exists a sense of ethereal attachment to the unborn child.  Many of the women with whom I have spoken are paralyzed by the feelings of guilt and failure in the wake of the loss.  Yet, it is the women who are able to view their heinous experience as an opportunity to reach out to God, who are able to transcend the loss.  One mother pointed out to me that even in the loss she felt as if God was reaching out to her.  She had embraced the perspective of Rabbi Akiva. 

A mother who sees her child suffer a personal tragedy is racked by feelings of grief and mourning.  A child’s heartbreak is often more trying upon the parent than on the child him/herself.   One mother cried to me, in the wake of her child’s pain, “I want to go back to yesterday.  Life was so much easier yesterday”. She felt the immense hurt of her young child.  Although they have not yet healed and are still working through these very difficult issues, they are moving forward.  Recently, the mother said to me that she begins now to see that good that has been born out of this sorrow. She has taken a step back to look at her own life and decided that she needs to refocus her efforts.  She is spending more time and energy on her family and less on her busy work life. She has been given this opportunity to see her child as courageous and amazing and does not hesitate to let her little one know this on a daily basis.  The mother has also been given the opportunity to grow in her own spiritual commitment, as she realizes how much worse it might have been and thanks Hashem that it is manageable.  This mother, like Rabbi Akiva, has taken her own tragedy and turned it into an opportunity to grow as a person and as an oved Hashem, a servant of Hashem.

We ourselves have this choice in our approach to life, in particular to sorrow and tragedy.  On this Tisha B’Av we should spend our time trying to make the destruction of the Beit HaMikdash our personal and current tragedy.  We should do so by incorporating our own sorrows into the mourning of the Batei haMikdash. But should we dwell on that sorrow? Should  we live in tragedy? Or should we use the tragedy as an opportunity to find redemption, to find the fulfillment of prophecy?  Our individual and communal tragedy is at minimum a way of making us stronger and more devoted to Hashem. Although it is difficult, it is often easier to dwell on how bad things are; we all need to take the time on this Tisha B’Av to look around us and find strength in our sorrow.  I now, personally, have the inspiration to look to Tisha B’Av with different eyes this year. I do not see it merely as a day of mourning, but I also see Tisha B’Av as a day of opportunity to open my eyes and see what I have before me and to thank Hashem for all of it.  I have the opportunity to say that all the trouble and sorrow that we go through is a part of the prophecy and now we are ready and waiting for the fulfillment of the other part of the prophecy, of the redemption. We need to be like Rabbi Akiva, who laughs when seeing foxes emerging from the Holy of Holies because we need to understand that this is a fulfillment of prophecy and therefore Hashem is required to fulfill the ultimate prophecy of Geula shelema, the ultimate redemption as well.  B’mehera b’yamenu, speedily in our days we should witness the fulfillment of the prophecy of Zechariah.