A man, his wife, and his mother in-law went on vacation to the Holy Land. While they were there, the mother-in-law suddenly passed away. The undertaker told them, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here in the Holy Land for $150.00." The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home. The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your mother in-law home, when it would be wonderful to have her buried here and spend only $150.00?" The man replied, "A man died here 2,000 years ago, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance."

I just took a chance telling that joke. I have my mother-in-law insurance policy up to date! Actually, I use this joke not only as an opener, but as a case in point. 

We have to be so especially careful when we speak ill of Israel. When I was studying in Yeshiva for the year, a prominent woman in my home community passed away. I was staying with Israeli friends who knew her and I shared with them the news that this woman had died and she was being buried in Israel.

Their reaction to the news was not at all what I expected. They were angry. They said, “You Americans, won’t live here, but you’ll take the graves on the Mountain of Olives, so Israelis like us can’t be buried there.” Yikes. I didn’t know how to respond. The man, who was a Talmid Chacham (Torah scholar), walked over to his sforim shrank and began leafing through a Midrash, having full mastery over its contents. It only took a few seconds for him to find what he wanted and he handed the text to me. It said:

"מעשה ברבי ורבי אליעזר שהיו מהלכין בפילי שחוץ לטבריא ראו ארון של מת שבא מחוצה לארץ להקבר בארץ ישראל אמר רבי לר' אליעזר מה הועיל זה שיצתה נשמתו בח"ל ובא להקבר בא"י אני קורא עליו (ירמיה ב) ונחלתי שמתם לתועבה בחייכם ותבאו ותטמאו את ארצי במיתתכם א"ל כיון שהוא נקבר בא"י הקדוש ברוך הוא מכפר לו דכתיב (דברים לב) וכפר אדמתו עמו" (בראשית רבה צ"ו:ב)

A story occurred with Rebbe and Rebbe Eliezer who were walking by the gate outside Tiberias and saw a casket which came from outside of Israel for burial. Rebbe said to Rebbe Eliezer, how will burial in Israel help this person who died in the Diaspora? I can relate the following verse (Yirmiyahu 2:7), “…You defiled my land, and made my heritage an abomination.” He (Rebbe Eliezer) responded, since he is buried in the Holy Land, he is atoned as it states, “And will make expiation for the land of his people” (Devarim 32:43).

A few weeks ago, when introducing the Parsha, we spoke of a non-Kosher bird called a Da’ah (Vayikra 11:14). This bird, also identified as the Ra’ah (Devarim 14:13), which is the root for the infinitive to see, is so called because of its extraordinary eyesight. The Talmud elaborates: ‘it can stand in Babylonia and see a nevelah, a carcass in Israel’ (Chulin 63b). Why then, asks Rabbi Zalman Sorotzkin, with such amazing talent, is this bird enumerated among the non-Kosher? He  answers that it uses its unbelievable ability to see neveilah, which can also mean death and destruction and negativity in Israel. It stands in chutz la’Aretz (Diaspora) and sees the negative aspects of life in Israel.

Do we have a right to criticize the Jewish state? If I took a poll I bet I’d find some who felt that we could and should when warranted, and some that adamantly identified such criticism as heresy. Perhaps we can differentiate public versus private critique. Rav Soloveitchik purportedly called Menachem Begin -both of whom shared ancestors from the same Lithuanian town of Brisk- after the Sabra and Shatila massacres in Lebanon, which Israel seemingly did not do enough to prevent. He was very angry with Begin and his government and let Begin have it. But he did it privately.

I also think there is another distinction to be made. Criticism that is constructive versus cynicism. 

What does cynicism mean? The dictionary uses terms such as distrust, disparaging, contemptuous and pessimistic.

The joke with which I opened is cynical, because it paints with a broad brush. Just Friday I heard a eulogy from a daughter-in-law who opened tearfully by stating that ‘all the jokes they say about mothers-in-law never applied to mine.’  If we constantly look for the neveilah in others – for that which is not kosher – we become cynical and most pathological cynics wear out their welcome pretty quickly. It’s negative, scornful and yes, pessimistic.

The cynicism of the Jews began at the end of last week’s parsha, when the Jews complained that they desired meat. The cynic sees God not as the Savior of all, but rather narrowly, as the one who took away my delicacies.

Rav Soloveitchik even explained that the cynicism of Israel caused Moshe’s death outside the Land of Israel. When Moshe invited his father-in-law to join the Jewish people’s march into Israel (Bamidbar 10:29-33), he really believed they were days away from entering the land, where he would be the King and live happily ever after. Moshe gleefully declares, nos’im anachnu’ – we’re off. But then we encounter the upside down Nuns in the Torah, which surround the statement, ‘Behold when the ark traveled’ – vay’hi binso’a ha’aron, the verse we sing when we remove the Torah from the Ark. The episode when the Jews became crazed for meat, ended the direct trek to salvation. The Rav stated, “The distance to that land suddenly became very long. Of course, there was no edict yet concerning forty years. But Mohe felt intuitively that the great march came to an end. Hopes he had would be unfulfilled, his prayers would be rejected. He knew that.” (The Rav, Thinking Aloud on the Parsha: Sefer Bamidbar, edited by R. David Holzer, pp, 51).

What was the sin of the scouts? Their words were not lies, but perhaps out of context or exaggerated. They were meant to be negative, scornful and pessimistic. They were meant to elicit the reaction that they did. Their words were cynical, and for this sin, they were punished; that entire generation never entered the land, due to their negativity and cynicism.

We have to be so careful in this area. Look a the punishment the Jews experienced! 

Our children pick up on our cynicism, be it about our schools, shuls and other beloved institutions which have targets painted on them for lashon hara (negative speech), rechilus (gossip) and motzi shem ra (slander). The same way that there is a fine line between a cute joke and cynicism, there is a fine line between bona fide criticism and full throttle cynicism.

There are enough mental health professionals in shul to explain how negativity is unhealthy for us both physically and emotionally. I defer to them, and often consult with them. But clearly, if you look at the behavior of the Children of Israel in the Book of Bamidbar, we begin to see much cynicism. Next week, the Midrash relates some stories about Korach’s challenge to Moshe that are the height of cynicism. He asked Moshe if a room filled with Torah scrolls, which contain the entire 5 Books of Moshe, need a mezuzah on the door. A mezuzah only contains a few paragraphs of those Five Books, but a tiny fraction. Moshe answered, of course, that it does. The Midrash relates this episode so show how Korach believed that he made Moshe into a laughing stock. I’m sure his band of 250 comrades giggled, scoffed and snidely put down the King of the Prophets.

Let us be cognizant of the difference between humor and cynicism, of knowing what is a joke and what is not, where to draw the line and where we’re still in appropriate territory.

The damning verses we cited above about the dead of the Diaspora entering Israel are from chapter two of the Book of Jeremiah. The chapter begins with words we know well, especially their citation during the High Holy Days.

"הלך וקראת באזני ירושלם לאמר כה אמר יהוה זכרתי לך חסד נעוריך אהבת כלולתיך לכתך אחרי במדבר בארץ לא זרועה" (ירמיהו ב:ב)

Go and cry in the ears of Jerusalem, saying, Thus said the Lord; I remember you, the devotion of your youth, your love like a bride, when you went after me in the wilderness, in a land that was not sown (Yirmiyahu 2:2).

Yirmiyahu delivered a message from God that He remembers us before we were jaded. Jaded is another word for cynical. He remembers the ‘good old days’ before we became cynics. It's interesting that Yirmiyahu began his prophetic career at a very young age, at a time of his 'youth.' 

One of the Chassidic masters (I have never seen this in print so can’t say who) pointed out something stunning about the end of the verse. He reads the verse a bit differently. ‘when you came with me in the wildernessba’eretz lo zruah. The simple meaning is that you followed me into unsown and uncharted territory. But he reads it as follows: to a land that is sown with 'no.' You entered an area that was filled with pessimism, cynicism and negativity. This is not the place we are to be. The scouts tried it and HASHEM had enough. The nation as a whole was punished more harshly than it ever had been; all because of the plague of ‘lo’, of cynicism and negativity. 

Let us learn what not to do from the scouts and follow the lead of Kalev – aloh na’aleh, we can and we will go up!