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Based on the Ma'amar "Ein Yei'ush Ba'Olam' in the sefer "Yichud Hahisbodedus" by Rav Avraham Tzvi Kluger. P5. Despair itself can be the source of sincere connection with Hashem. The beautiful example of bringing guests into our home. Days of wealth (spiritual and/or physcial) and days of poverty. An "ore'ach," a guest, is an "ohr ches" (the light of 8, Chanukah) - he brings light into our life. Receiving a higher light during "lowly guest" moments. How do we get from yeiush (often about our own actions) to actual improvement? Whatever we are going through at this moment is a gift from Hashem for this moment. It is exactly because of our broken heartedness that we can feel closeness to Hashem. At times, when we feel just a little bit too comfortable with our relationship with Hashem, He might send us an unwelcome guest, a test, an opening, a reason to feel despair; but these are the exact moments which help us return to Him in a true and humble way. The example of Sarah Imeinu's infertility - her laughter. Moshiach can only come when we let go completely, and when nothing makes sense anymore. It's not what I thought it would be, but just let it be. Rebbe Nachman's final scream.
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